On the Eve of My Daughter’s 4th Birthday, Remembering Her Home Birth

Four years ago this week, I gave birth to my second child. Just like my first child, she was born at home, attended by the midwives at BirthCare, based in Alexandria, Virginia. Those days were among the two best of my life. The support and love I felt was something I hope I never forget. I loved having one person with me from start to finish – and I also loved being able to do exactly what my body was telling me it needed to do. That is not how I envisioned a hospital birth would be for me.

I’m proud of those births – and they make me feel powerful. Those contractions? They were from me! That was my body’s power – and it was incredible. Both midwives who attended my births were strong and reassuring, and the love and energy surrounding me was incredible.

I took a lot of heat for planning home births from friends and family. The news media and the American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists piled on often, it seemed. On the eve of my daughter’s 4^th birthday, I want to set the record straight. I am not crazy. I believe I had the best care available at my home births. Recent studies support me.

The news media doesn’t have to sell this story as if home birth and hospital birth are mutually exclusive – and pretend that women choose to birth at home because we’re vain. We could instead, support each other’s choices – and recognize that there’s a place for all of them. My birth experience doesn’t take away from your birth experience, and your birth experience doesn’t take away from my birth experience. We can have different experiences, and they can both be exactly what we wanted and wonderful.

We all want healthy babies and mamas. And sometimes, a hospital birth is the best place for that to happen, and sometimes a home birth is the best place for that to happen. I’m hoping before my daughter gives birth we can find some middle ground that allows both practices to thrive –and in turn we will all enjoy thriving mamas and babies.

I’ve witnessed birth up close – mine, and others. With power like that in the world, I know we can figure this out.

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By Elaine|2011-10-11T09:15:36-04:00October 11th, 2011|Parenting, Pregnancy|

About the Author: Elaine

In 1997, Elaine landed in DC where she put her public policy degree to work. She didn't know at the time she'd eventually own a home in the suburbs, be married to a government employee, and have two incredible children. But then, she’s heard that from a lot of moms at the playgrounds around Arlington. As a part-time worker, Elaine contributes to the Tax Policy Center's blog TaxVox and has recently agreed to produce a regular commentary for the blogtalk radio program, Shared Sacrifice. When she's not at work, she maintains her own blog to bridge the distance between far away family and herself and to alleviate the guilt associated with never even purchasing a baby book for either of her children. She believes in the power of long walks, vacationing, and forgetting about the clock. She's got her eye on the Fall of 2011 when her youngest child will surely be ready for her first international vacation. Prior to becoming a mom, she was an avid potter and chocolate maker and hopes someday to return to both of these hobbies. In the meantime, she feels incredibly lucky to have found such an incredible community of women bloggers in the DC area. Prior to its closure, Elaine enjoyed a brief period writing for DCMetroMoms.